{Relationships} The 'Living-Together' Pandemic

My Great Aunt and Uncle on their 40th Wedding Anniversary!  Sticking together is something to be celebrated!!

With Josh and I having recently become engaged, I can't even begin to tell you how much advice we have received from people on how they would "do over" their experience and what, in their opinion, we should do during our pre-marriage days. One of the most common questions we have been asked besides "Have you set a date," has been "You guys are moving in together first, right?" 

In the very beginning stages of our dating relationship, Josh and I discussed what our intentions were (dating with the purpose of finding our life-partner/helpmate) and if we found that we were meant for each other, what the process would look like. We both agreed from day one (October 21, 2011) that we would choose to honor God with purity until our wedding night and that if it came to getting engaged and married that we would only move in together after we tied the knot. Our relationship is very modern in many ways, but for things pertaining to our faith and beliefs, I supposed we are what American's today would consider 'old-fashioned' and I am perfectly okay with that. 

It seems almost timely that an article on cohabiting before marriage posted on The New York Times Sunday Review has recently become viral. In this article, clinical psychologist, Meg Jay, catalogs the revolution of cohabitation before marriage and why it, often times leads to the demise of marriage. I sincerely encourage all of my readers to click the link and at least skim the article. It is from a secular perspective, but still presents the case for not moving in together.

She quotes a few studies that have been done on how this became the norm in America and what it means for the dynamic of American dating and marriage. One of the she wrote confirms something I have been saying for years about the American family changing because of the sexual revolution that occurred in the 1960's...

"Cohabitation in the United States has increased by more than 1,500 percent in the past half century. In 1960, about 450,000 unmarried couples lived together. Now the number is more than 7.5 million. The majority of young adults in their 20s will live with a romantic partner at least once, and more than half of all marriages will be preceded by cohabitation. This shift has been attributed to the sexual revolution and the availability of birth control, and in our current economy, sharing the bills makes cohabiting appealing. But when you talk to people in their 20s, you also hear about something else: cohabitation as prophylaxis."

 The acceptance of having sex before you get married is what has made prophylaxis an issue in the first place; it doesn't help that having 'up to seven sexual partners in your lifetime' is being advocated by pediatricians. Yes, I love my old pediatrician, but I cringed when we began these routine talks at my annual check-ups once I turned fifteen.  She was proud of my decision for abstinence, but assured me that my thoughts would change when I got a boyfriend. They didn't!  And actually, if anything, it made me more committed to my decision to wait. You don't have to worry about disease prevention if you aren't sexually active!!!

Many people also think that it is a necessity for a couple to live together before they get married so they can do a 'test-drive' before they get make a commitment to get hitched. When Meg asked one of her clients how she and her significant other ended up moving in together, she mentioned that "it just happened." When couples are having sex before they get married and are spending multiple nights per week at the house of their partner, the case for moving in to save money on rent and bills arises. Meg attributes this transition to a term called 'sliding-not-deciding.'

The danger with this is that when moving in together just happens, it jumps the gun for the natural stages of progression for relationships and many issues that should have been addressed first are swept under the rug. The predicament that moving in with a partner causes is the inability to walk away if you realize you aren't meant for each other; each person is dependent upon the other for a place to eat, sleep, and live. Eventually, they you get comfortable enough with each other that you decide to take the next step of getting married and quite often realize years (sometimes only months!) later that you are just really great coed roommates.

And America wonders why the divorce rate is said to be around 55%.

With everyone trying to jam their ideas down the throats of newly-engaged, it's really good to know the reasons behind the decisions you and your man have chosen to walk out your relationship the way you have. Not that everyone deserves to know every knitty-gritty detail, but just do that you can continue to honor God with your relationship. It really can help others when you choose to stay strong and not let the temptations of the world get to you. By choosing to stay pure and also to not move in together before marriage, you are telling the world that you hold the Biblical example of marriage sacred and dear and that you respect each other and GODS WORD enough to go against societal norms. It's just another way to use the pre-marriage stage of your relationship to reflect God's work in your life, and it definitely makes Him smile :)

{Guest Post} Tips For Races in Colder Weather

Running in colder weather can affect your performance. Just like anything else when it comes to sports, you have to prepare your body for the change in order to overcome the issue and achieve your goals. In this case, we will discuss some strategies in persevering through the cold so you can finish your upcoming race in the desired timeframe that you want to. Just because it’s cold, doesn’t mean running season is over! So, here we go, let’s talk about some tips for cold-weather running:

1.       Acclimatization. This is a super fancy word that basically means if you train in the cold, you’ll be able to perform in the cold. By introducing your body to these temperatures a little at a time, you will be able to adapt and thus excel. The same concept applies to preparing for extreme heat. This repetitive exposure helps to improve blood flow and regulate it as needed. So, in order to achieve this, it’s simple: run outside whenever you can and as much as you can prior to your winter race.

2.       Wear Easy Layers. And by easy, I mean easy to carry because you are more than likely going to be peeling off those layers as you run your race. We all know how it works: you start out freezing, then as your blood starts pumping from your increased heart rate, you begin to get warmer (even if it is snowing out). To sum it all up, wear layers that you can wrap around your waist or tuck in a strap real quick. With this strategy, you can adjust along the way, so you don’t end up being too warm.

3.       Start with Your Hands and Head. We lose a lot of heat through these outlets. At the beginning of the race, make sure you have gloves and a hat to keep that heat in and keep the energy to help you get going. Of course, you can always take them off as you warm up once you are further into the race. Keeping your hands and head warm at the start can make all the difference in your performance.

4.       Warm-Up … Outside. Warming up before any form of physical activity is essential, we all know that. However, when you’re about to take it outside to run, especially before a race, try and do your warm-ups and stretching outside in the cold. This not only attributes to the acclimatization aspect, but also prevents any sweating to occur pre-workout that might make you even colder when you step outdoors to take off.  

5.       Listen to Your Body. That’s the bottom line. Some temperatures are not meant to battle with. If it’s too cold, then OK – take it inside. We only progress when we do the right thing, and sometimes that means knowing when to stop pushing through. So, maybe on that one day where it’s freezing, rainy and windy, you practice at the gym. Above all, your body knows what’s best for you, so take a listen!

This article was provided by Happy Can, an Atlanta portable restroom company. We are a proud provider of porta potties and portable sinks for some of the top Atlanta-area races.

{Motivation Monday} Save Your Halloween Candy!

If you are anything like me, you probably dread the weeks following Halloween because you have a bucket-full of candy that just seems to be calling your name all day long. It's just a little 'fun-sized' piece, it won't hurt anything, right?  Well one 'fun-sized' piece turns into four in order to create a full-sized candy bar and at some point it turns into snacking on one piece every hour throughout the day. It's the beginning of the "winter downhill slide" that starts with said Halloween candy only to be followed up a month later with Thanksgiving leftovers, then another whammy at Christmas and New Years. What's a fittie to do?

This year, I took all of my Halloween Candy and stashed it in the smallest Victoria's Secret Bag that I had laying around (I did this and then hid it in my closet so my siblings wouldn't find it... and if they did go snooping for candy, they would never in a million years touch a VS bag) and covered it with pink tissue paper. I stashed it like this so it wouldn't be laying out on my dresser for my siblings (and myself) to be tempted to sneak a piece every day. Instead of throwing it all away, I kept it as a reward for myself on treat day. Anyone who has started a weight-loss/fitness journey will tell you that treat day is imperative to staying on track with your lifestyle change. Any time I think about that candy being stashed, I use it as motivation to go fit my workout in so I can earn my candy on treat day.

How do you all reward yourselves on treat day?  What tips and tricks do you use to prevent the downhill slide in winter? 

New Posting Schedule!

Hello Dear Followers!

With only one and a half months left until the new year, I have decided to begin a posting schedule. I have been motivated to do this so that I can remain consistent in posting for you all. My goal for 2014 is to build a blog that women can come to for inspiration and motivation to become the best they can be. I will be doing my best to follow this new blogging schedule....

Sundays - {Spiritual Fitness} - Posts will pertain to living a God-centered life

Mondays - {Motivation Monday} - inspirational quotes, pictures, and monthly challenges

Tuesdays - {Recipe} - recipes for healthy food, quick meals, snacks, and the occasional 'treat day recipe'

Wednesdays - {Workout Wednesday} - Most will include a compilation of my favorite YouTube Workouts, Zumba Routines, and other muscle group specific workouts.

Thursdays - {Guest Post} - I am looking to add some of your stories/inspiration to my blog!  If you are interested, please email me your post that does not exceed 750 words at imove92 at gmail dot com. I will add your post into the schedule for Thursdays

Fridays - {Relationships} - This will pertain to maintaining healthy relationships whether it be familial, friendships or romance. Also fun date ideas, dating tips for Christian girls, and how to reflect Christ in our relationships.

Saturdays - {Product Review} - This will include random reviews on some of my favorite products; fitness, food, protein powders, granola bars, and maybe even a book or make up. :)


I will also be doing a monthly give-away contest as a way to increase interaction on my blog and also give back to my 'blog family'. Over all, I am super excited to start this new chapter of blogging with all of you and grow together in our journey to spiritual and physical fitness. 

{Spiritual Fitness} Whom Shall I Fear?

I am so incredibly sorry for my lack of posting this past week. After helping my boyfriend, Josh get settled into his house in Cincinnati, my life here in Pittsburgh has become a whirlwind. I have decided that rather than spending this time apart sad and depressed that I only get to see him twice per month, I will use it to get my career together and to reach personal goals that I haven't had time to pour myself into until now. This blog is one of those things!

I have always been the type to go hard to get what I want; I feel that it is really important to have goals in life in order to stay on track and focused. With fitness, weight loss, school, and personal things, having an end goal helps to create a path for the journey and make it a little clearer. I have found that prayer is my best guide when considering things I would like to add to my plate. It seems like every time I am at a cross roads with decision/goal making, God is always faithful to reveal His desire for me when I ask Him to. This song has been a theme song for me since the day that I heard it...

Josh and I have been praying a lot lately about his decision to move to Cincinnati, wondering how to interpret the fact that he had been having a rough time adjusting to the new market. The question came up, "How do I know if this is Satan tempting me and keeping me from my goal, or if it's God telling me that I made the wrong decision?"  This one is HARD because there isn't a clear-cut answer.

Last night as I was working out, this song came up on my Slacker Radio station, and I felt like it was an answer to the prayer we have been lifting up for the past week. Immediately I sent it to Josh. This morning he was reminded to pray before he goes out into the field and by 3:00 PM he had three sales. When we include the Lord in our decisions, and follow up with Him along the way, He will ALWAYS make his will known. In this case, it was via encouragement from a Chris Tomlin song, but He can choose to show his will in other ways too. I am a firm believer that every situation can be redeemed, we just have to seek the redemption out.

There is such a relief in knowing that God has all of our days mapped out and He knows what we are going to do before we even do it. That's why He wants us to seek him when we make our goals and decisions. It's like having the guide to life!  Why wouldn't you want to use it?

{Workout} It's "Leg Day" at Home!

All you need for this amazingly intense workout at home is a set of either 5 or 8 pound weights, a great playlist, and a 4x6 foot section of carpet (even a DORM room will be sufficent!). I like to use light weights and do more repotitions so I build strong, lean, feminine muscle... Not bulk. If you're looking to slim down, this is for you; if you're looking to bulk up, it probably isn't. 

I always start with legs and glutes in the standing position...

50 weighted squats (I know you hate them, but it really is the best all around butt and legs exercise... The results are worth it!)

40 weighted dead lifts (this is great for the part of your legs that meets your rear)

25 standing right leg side lifts 

25 standing left leg side lifts 

40 right leg kick backs (kick the leg back as far as you can behind you, squeezing your glutes)

40 left leg kick backs

Then move to the floor...

50 leg openers (lay on your back legs straight in the air, slowly open them as far as you can and slowly bring them back together. That's one rep)

50 booty lifts (laying on your back with your knees bent and hands down by your side, lift your booty off the floor, hold for a second, then lower to an inch above the floor and repeat)

40 right fire hydrants (on all fours, channel your inner puppy as you lift your leg up like you were marking your territory on a fire hydrant. Keep your leg bent though!)

40 left fire hydrants 

30 right hamstring curls (again on all four, lift one leg up directly behind you keeping the knee bent; flex your foot as you straighten your leg from being bent to straight behind you, then bend it again and repeat.)

 

30 left hamstring curls

30 right leg isolated bent leg pulses (go back to the hamstring curl position and pulse your bent leg up in the air, squeezing the glutes.)

30 left leg isolated bent leg pulses

When you're finished don't forget to stretch the major muscle groups in your legs and booty :) let me know what workout you all would like to see next!

{Recipe} Chocolate Peanut Butter Banana Shake

This shake has been so helpful in keeping me full and helping keep my migraines at bay. It's by no means a low calorie shake, but when you are living an active and healthy lifestyle it's is important to get enough protein, carbs, and calories to give you energy at the start of the day. 

Ingredients: 

1 whole banana

1 cup of vanilla Greek yogurt 

4 Tbs. Trader Joes chocolate hemp seed powder 

1 Tbs peanut butter

1 cup of ice

1/2 cup of water 

What to do: 

Mix it all together in the blender/food processor and enjoy!