{Boyfriends} Disrespect in What You Aren't Doing

trust: belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc. (Merriam Webster's Online Dictionary)

In a relationship, trust is such a multifaceted word. People tend to think that trust only has to do with knowing your significant other isn't going to cheat on you with someone else. For many, it takes a while to get to that point in their relationship because we bring "hurt" to the relationship in what we like to call "trust-issues." It may be worse now than ever because the concept of dating has become a past-time rather than a means of figuring out if you are compatible for life. It's all about the here and now and if you get along for now. 

This is why I really hate the fact that people today just "date around" in order to fill a hole in their soul that is loneliness. God never intended for a relationship between a man and a woman to be such a stressful speculation or a means of finding our self-worth. That's what HE is for! 

When you have been dating your man for a while and have built your relationship solidly on the rock that is The Word of God, there enters a third party mediator that acts as accountability for both you. It makes trusting the other to be faithful so much easier. Eventually in a long-term relationship you reach the point of being able to say whole-heartedly, "I know he would never even CONSIDER cheating on me." It's commonplace trust. 

But what about when he ask you if you trust him in other aspects?  What if he asks if you trust his decision-making ability for both of your futures?  That's HARD!  It's one thing to know your man would never cheat on you, but it's another to be so sure that he has BOTH of your interests in mind to allow him to make decisions that impact not only HIS but also YOUR future! 

A really good example of this is a conversation Josh and I had tonight, actually. He is moving to Cincinnati on October 5th, and I (obviously) have been taking it pretty hard. I don't do well with change AT ALL.  For some reason, I thought he's always come pick me up for dates at my parents house - even after we got married. Silly me, I know, but I have questioned him multiple times about if he's sure this is the right move for his career. After probably five different times of this questioning followed by me crying, he finally sort of snapped on me tonight. Looking back at our conversation, I absolutely had it coming. All this time I have been saying with my mouth that I support his decision whatever it may be, but my actions have been saying the exact opposite. 

"Trust is so much more than knowing I'm not going to cheat on you, Danielle. It's trusting that I can make a decision for my career that I know in the end will be the best for both of our benefit. Why can't you see that?  It's the kind of trust that makes our relationship ready for the next level of getting past boyfriend/girlfriend love we have now." 

I honestly had never thought of trust in Josh to be letting go of control and trusting that God is speaking to him enough to trust that the decision he makes will be what is in God's plan for us. How disrespectful of me to think that He hasn't heard clearly from God on this?!  At the time when I thought I had been supporting him the most, I have been so so wrong. Is it hard to let go of my control freak nature and my need to have every action carefully planned the way I want it? Oh my gosh, it's the hardest thing I've done. But this is what I have been looking for in a relationship!  A Godly man that challenges me and calls me out when I need it. One that is so sure in his God-filled decision-making that he is willing to stand up and cause an argument for what he believes God is calling him to do. But I shouldn't provoke him to that.

As his future wife (we aren't engaged yet, but have a purposeful relationship of two years and are heading in the engagement direction :)), I am excited that we had this argument tonight because it is laying the ground work for me to learn how to be submissive to him knowing that he is making choices of love for me and desire to please the Lord with his life. 

18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. - Colossians 3:18-19

That is so admirable to me and it makes me love him even more to know that he is setting our relationship up to be one that is truly pleasing to God. When our men are making decisions based on having heard from God, it is not our place to question it though it is insanely hard!  Sometimes we think of things that they may not have, but being able to bring our thoughts to our guys without it seeming confrontational or seeming to question their ability to make a choice, is a matter of how we choose our words. Saying something like, "Are you sure you prayed about this?" is incredibly offensive. However, something like, "Have you thought/prayed about {fill in the blank here}?" is a way to get your concerns across without being condescending. I am so excited to be learning this now before we get married so we have a strong base to fall back on throughout our lives now and in the future when we are married and making a life with each other. 

Josh and I at the Pirate's game vs. the Reds last night :)  We love baseball and I think he's warming up to candid pictures (it's about time, seeing as he is dating a photographer!)

{Treat Day Recipe} Gluten Free Dairy Free Chocolate Nutella Cupcakes

Ok, that's a mouth full. And yes, I realize this recipe isn't necessarily healthy, but it's designed for "treat day" and is gluten and dairy free... so it has some redemption. I made it this afternoon with the kids I nanny, and it turned out fabulously. And actually now that I'm thinking about it, Nutella may not be dairy free, but it can be easily left out.

Ingredients to Make Cupcakes:

- 1 cup Bob's Red Mill Gluten Free All-Purpose Baking Flour

- 1/2 cup Tapioca Flour

- 1/2 cup Potato Starch

- 2/3 cup Cocoa Powder

- 1 tsp. Xanthan Gum

- 2 tsp. Baking Powder

- 1 tsp. Baking Soda

- 1/2 tsp. salt

- 1 cup sugar (or sugar substitute)
- 2 eggs
- 1 tsp Vanilla
- 1/2 cup Almond Milk
- 1/2 cup Brewed Coffee
- 2/3 cup Canola Oil

Ingredients to Make Chocolate Nutella Frosting:

- 4 cups Powdered Sugar

- 1/3 cup Cocoa Powder

- 1/3 cup Brewed Coffee

- 1/3 cup of Nutella

- 1 stick of Fleichman's Butter, softened 

- 1/3 cup Almond Milk

- 1/2 tsp. Vanilla 

What to Do:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and line muffin tin with 24 cupcake liners.

2. Mix together all dry ingredients (including sugar) for cupcakes in a medium-sized bowl. After it has all been mixed, break up any clumps that may have formed, then add all of the wet ingredients. Be careful to not over-mix, because xanthan gum has the tendency to become gummy when it's over-worked. The batter should be somewhat thick, but light and airy.

3. Using two spoons, scoop two tablespoon-sized scoops of batter into each cupcake liner, filling about 1/3 from the top. 

4. Bake at 350 for 12-16 minutes or until your cupcakes spring back up when touched in the center and a knife comes out clean. Let cool. 

5. Mix together powdered sugar and cocoa powder, adding the butter, Nutella and vanilla. Stir until well incorporated, then add the coffee and almond milk. Whisk until frosting is a smooth consistency, spread over cooled cupcakes and enjoy!

My nanny kids wanted to make something with the Halloween Theme, so we used a kit for the liners and decorations that I picked up from Michael's Craft Store for $6.99.

{Recipe} Chocolate Banana Coconut Protein Shake

Ingredients: 

1 medium sized banana chilled

1/2 packet of Spiriuteen Chocolate Protein powder

1 Coconut Chobani Greek Yogurt 

1 cup of ice 

1 cup of water

What to do: 

1. Add everything to a blender or food processor and enjoy! 

{Fitspo} This Totally Happened!

Last night, my most favorite celebrity trainer, Dolvett Quince and I were able to talk a bit on Twitter! Not going to lie... I was geeking out over here. 

After having seen him on The Biggest Loser and the way he genuinely seems to care for the people he works with, he became my fitness role model. This was really exciting and encouraging for me, because exactly what he said is what I have been striving for! 

{YouTube Workout} Zumba to P!nk!

Good morning, all!  Here is a short cardio workout to add to your toning routine for today! It starts off with one of my most favorite warm up songs, and they rest are by P!nk. If you have any suggestions for songs you'd like to see in the next Zumba playlist, let me know!

The best thing about Zumba is that you don't have to be good at dancing for it to work!  Just shaking your body and putting effort in will show results. So, if it's your first time doing Zumba, remember to not get frustrated and just laugh it off when you mess up!  I've been to tons of classes where even the INSTRUCTOR messes up!  You can do it :)





My suggestion is to start with yesterday's toning post, then move to doing this playlist for cardio. If you feel like it's too much, just skip to the songs you like!

Happy Friday!!

{YouTube Workout} Total Body Workout Number One

If you are anything like me, your busy schedule doesn't leave a huge amount of time to fit in your ideal workout every day. That's why it's important to target exactly what you need to get done in a short amount of time. Over time, I will be creating and posting my own videos on YouTube of the workouts I did to help me lose 80 pounds, but it may be a while before I get the chance to get them done. Often, I find myself searching YouTube to get some fresh inspiration to keep my workout fun, and not surprisingly, there is a treasure trove of awesome stuff for fitties like us! Until I get my own videos up, I'm going to be posting links to the videos I love. Each post with the title {YouTube Workout} will be designed to do once through (or more times if you want!) and will target most of the "trouble" areas we tend to focus on.

So, if you're feeling energetic today try to complete all of the "mini-workouts" I have in the first play list. However, if you want to start easy, just pick four and make every move count!  Just a heads up, you'll need a set of free weights (or as they mention, cans of soup work too if you don't have access to a set of hand weights) and some water.

Start by stretching a little then get right into working on your abs....

Then work on your inner thighs!  I will warn you, this is tough!!

We'd be lying if we said we didn't like the results of this one. It's hard but SO worth it.

Legs, Legs, Legs

Then even it up with arms!

And just so you all know, I did this exact play list once a day for two weeks and saw results by day three. So, keep up the hard work and let me know how you like it!!! Add in a little bit of cardio to fill up and hour, and you've got a great workout to do at least three times per week.  Happy exercising!

{Recipe} Cold Veggie Pizza

This super-easy, kid-friendly pizza can be made for about $13.00 and only takes 25 minutes to make! 

Ingredients:

1 can of Pillsbury Crescent Dough Sheets

1 zucchini peeled and cut into about 1/4 of an inch cubes

1 tomato cut into 1/4 inch cubes and drained 

1/2 of a red bell pepper cubed 

1/2 of a yellow bell pepper cubed

1/2 of an orange bell pepper cubed 

1 shallot 

2 green onions diced

1 package of light cream cheese 

Sea salt

What to do: 

1. Preheat oven to 375. Spread the crescent dough out on a cookie sheet or pizza stone and bake for 12 minutes or until golden brown. 

2. Cut the veggies and mix in a bowl to top the pizza with later. (Save a small amount of shallots and green onions to mix into the cream cheese). 

3. Put the cream cheese into a small mixing bowl and loosen by stirring with a fork. Add rest of shallots and green onion to the cream cheese. 

4. Once the pizza crust has cooled, spread cream cheese mixture over it leaving an inch around the edges. Top with the veggie mixture, patting it down into the cream cheese. 

5. Finish off with a sprinkle of sea salt and shredded mozzarella cheese and put in the refrigerator for 30 minutes or until its reached desired coldness.

Keeps well in the refrigerator with cellophane in between layers. 

Have an idea for a recipe variation? Add your ideas into the comments section below :)

{Fitspo} Finding an Eternal Motivation

Over the course of posting on this blog, I will be featuring a "Fitspo" section. It will be a series of posts that are intended to help you stay motivated to be healthy. Sometimes they will be quotes, pictures, articles, and Bible verses, but I wanted to start the section off with what I feel is the most important reason to have consistency in our workout lives. 

We all tend to lose inspiration to maintain a "fittie" lifestyle every now and then. When you get to those times, what do you look to for inspiration?  A lot of people follow Twitter and Instagram feeds of fellow "fitfamily" members who post pictures of themselves killing it at the gym and seeing results. Others watch shows like "The Biggest Loser" so they can be reminded of what they don't want to become. These things are great to get an immediate spike in enthusiasm, but it will taper off quickly. What if we could find a way to get AND STAY motivated? We can!

"Don't you know that all the runners in the stadium run, but only one gets the prize? So run to win. Everyone who competes practices self-discipline in everything. The runners do this to get a crown of leaves that will shrivel up and die, but we do it to receive a crown that will never die. So this is how I run - not with a clear goal in sight. I fight like a boxer in the ring, not like someone who is shadow boxing. Rather, I am landing punches on my own body and subduing it like a slave. I do this so that I myself won't be disqualified after preaching to others."

                                                                                                      - 1 Corinthians 9:24-27

When we look at exercise in the light of our call as Christians on this earth, it makes sense that it should be a practice that EVERYONE is employing. Earlier in the chapter, Paul discusses not letting anything to get in the way of the gospel of Christ.

There are plenty of ways that not exercising will get in the way of the gospel going forth. People who exercise consistently and take care of their bodies show that they are the type of "self-disciplined" that Paul is talking about. When we give our lives over to Christ and he dwells in us, our bodies have become a temple to host His Spirit (1 Corinthians, Chapter 6). We need to LIVE OUT what we know in our minds about our relationship with Christ. When we choose to take the route to beat our bodies into submission and resist the temptation of sweets, watching TV instead of getting your workout time in, and taking the lazy way out, that is how we can glorify God.

Setting a "goal weight" (I too am guilty of this) does the spiritual aspect of exercise such a grave injustice. We are not to exercise with a goal weight in mind, we are to do it in order to be the best we can be as a temple of Christ. Yes, it is good to be FIT so we can remain in good health to serve the Lord, but fit does not necessarily mean skinny. It means being in good shape and in good health and that is going to look vastly different for everyone. It also means staying spiritually fit by staying in the Word, and having a surrounding of other Christians that are going to be your "iron sharpening iron".

So here is where we find our eternal inspiration, friends. Stay fit and be consistent in order to keep your body in shape as a show of the Lord manifesting self-discipline in you; not to be the "best looking" or so that you can get the best time at a triathlon.